Ten Things That Love Should NOT Feel Like…

Being in love has got to be one of the most amazing feelings ever…next to seeing your newborn son or daughter for the first time after labor (so I hear). That “in love” feeling is also amazing when you are loved back.

Well…now knowing what love is, I also know what love is not. I’m not an authority on the subject, but the heart will never lie to you.

Let’s go:

  1. Love should never make you feel fear.
  2. Love should not feel like a “chore”.
  3. Love should not be extremely hard or feel tough.
  4. Love should never make you feel as though you are alone.
  5. If someone loves you, you should never feel as though they just “don’t care”.
  6. Love should never place you in a state of confusion.
  7. Love never fails; if it’s hurting you, then it isn’t love.
  8. Love should never feel as though it isn’t supportive; love IS an anchor and something that grounds you, holding you steady in the midst of ANYTHING.
  9. Love should never make you question your decision TO love (deep)…AND FINALLY…
  10. LOVE NEVER LIES…

I won’t part my lips to say I Love You and not mean it…that’s the problem though; people say it, knowing full well that it’s empty and FAR from sincere.

Your best bet? Pray before you commit yourself to someone. Let God order your steps in a new or even a more seasoned relationship! You can even get better footing w someone if you have fallen off track, yet you all are on the same page, and willing to work at the relationship. Do the work BEFORE things go sour (if they ever do). Just make sure that you know that “flowers, bells, whistles, and candy” ALL of the time is not real. There will be disagreements, heated discussions, anger, etc., but love has the extreme and undeniable power to conquer any of those things. Just have enough sense to keep an open mind.

Take my poll and let me know if you agree w this post!

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Open That Door

It’s been a while since I’ve blogged, and in all honesty, it’s been by design! I needed to take a mini break to get settled in my newest role…

FULL TIME ENTREPRENEUR.

Yes…as of April 1, 2013 (April Fool’s Day lol) I quit my job in “corporate America”. It came out of nowhere. Nope…I didn’t give two weeks notice; nope, I have not a single regret. I politely told my mgmt person this simple phrase: “I think I am going to have to make my last day here TODAY”. Imagine the look of shock on his face when I said that! I was confident in my decision, had already taken a peak at my financial situation, and decided that I had to act NOW. And I did!

I’ve been happy ever since.

Thing is, in order for me to truly get the weight off of my shoulder, I had to open the door of LEAVING that job. I was MISERABLE (I’m sure some of you have viewed past posts which made reference to my disdain for that place…), and I could not “find joy” in having to be there for seven hours and forty five minutes of my life, day in and day out, anymore. I thought about how much money I had been making there, and let out a sigh…the money was great, but not enough to keep me from being unhappy. I just know that I could no longer take the misery!

I left…and not 10 minutes after I was gone, I received two referrals to manage social media for their brands. For a while I had been working full time on BOTH–the corporate job and my career–and I was completely worn out. One had to go…and it was NOT going to be my PR Firm…

In order for me to receive the vision TOTALLY, I had to open that door of “the money is good at this job though”, walk ALL THE WAY out of it, and activate my faith. My spirit is free now. I may not be making the same amount of money that I was bringing home from the corporate job, but my clientele is picking up tremendously, and I have yet to be worried about making ends meet. I refuse to worry about what God has already done!

I challenge you to Open That Door. The door to working out, establishing your place in society, being open to love, mending a friendship, saving more money…whatever the “door” is for you, go ahead and open it. A huge part of your life’s work is to strengthen what already exists inside of you.

Be free to be who you are; my testimony is simply that I chose to Open That Door. Here’s a look at my door: http://www.prbyelle77.com

Title: Sherry Burton Ways Virtual Book Tour Day 1!!!

I am happy to share with you a special article by Sherry.

Your Favorite Color Is For Your Healing Color.

The colors and images in your decor reflect aspects of yourself that can build you up or tear you down. Color can nurture your soul as food nourishes your body. Determine what colors are your favorites. Which ones feed you right down to your bones, and energize and heal you? Whatever colors they are, make sure that you have them somewhere in your environment. Choose items in your favorite colors, such as fabrics, vases, dishes, and flowers, and place them where they can feed you at a glance. Whether it is the violet light within an amethyst crystal or the vibrant turquoise glaze on your favorite mug, feast on the colors that nourish you.

The best way to learn about the effect of colors is to look at those we choose in our home environment. These give many clues to our personalities and inner feelings. Carefully chosen colors can build our self-image so that we are better able to cope with the stresses of modern life and improve our relationships with others.

Color preferences coincide with major changes in our lives, and a change in attitude or physical state is often accompanies by a change in our color preferences. Think about one of your favorite rooms in your house. What colors are mostly in that room? Do these colors uplift you or make you depressed? If so, find colors that make you feel good.

Tomorrow Faith Hunter will host the tour on her blog Faith Hunter with a video: “Mid Winter Blues? Here are Two Quick Interior Tips!” http://embracedc.com/about/blog

Visit Sherry’s website to sign up to win a prize!

* Grand prize: A copy of Sherry’s book along with her grand prize of a 30-minute H.O.M.E. Interior Environment Intro Coaching Session via Skype or in person depending on location.

* A copy of Sherry’s book along with a 20-minute Color Therapy Consultation via Skype. Color Therapy Consults for interior color is one of the first elements you notice when you walk into a room, and color resonates with you when you leave. Color sets a mood: The right color combination can transform a home or office and bring all who reside there new levels of energy. Custom color palettes for interior walls can bring happiness, harmony and well-being.
* A copy of Feel Good Spaces: A Guide for Decorating Your Home for the Body, Mind, & Spirit

To see the complete virtual book tour line up, follow each host on Twitter! And to connect with them on Facebook, click here!

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7BloggerDays!

Just WRITE!

Do you have any idea how FREEING that is??

You can be as ANGRY as you want to be on paper…and at times, that helps you to get out those “loose” emotions…you know, the things you probably would regret actually “saying” to someone…

Try this 7BloggerDays list that I created, in an effort to get more of you writing. It doesn’t have to be a dissertation; it could be all pictures if you’d like! Just make sure you say SOMETHING!

JAN11: Your favorite moment

JAN12: Your favorite part of a really good movie and what you learned from it

JAN13: How you feel about social media

JAN14: Your favorite outfit

JAN15: Describe the last thing you cooked or (for those who don’t cook) describe your favorite meal

JAN16: **PICTURE** a picture of yourself and what was going on at that time

JAN17: A funny moment

Make sure you let me know about your post so that I can read! I will be doing the 7BloggerDays w you all!

GO!

Lauran

You Wanna Run That By Me Again? (31)

I had a different post that was to go up for the Hump Day Blog, but I HAD to touch on this. And it all stemmed from a photograph on Instagram that I am in TOTAL agreement with.

An absolute truth...

An absolute truth…

For those who may not be familiar w what I actually look like, I am a “dark-skinned” African-American Woman. Yet, in order to be considered “pretty” or “beautiful”, the skin tone that carries the most beauty, stereotypically, is one w a lighter hue. The phrase “you are pretty for a dark skin girl” has been said to me on several occasions, and each time, it was not taken as a compliment…because it’s NOT a compliment. Saying someone is pretty FOR any reason other than just being “pretty” is insulting, rude, offensive, disrespectful and extremely ignorant. It’s the same as saying something like ‘you are very attractive for a business owner’–does that make any sense? Neither does the message in that photo…

When I was a little girl, living in the South, I was often teased FOR my dark skin. I was called all kinds of names, and words do indeed hurt (you can lie to yourself if you want to). I would come home crying to my parents about how I was made fun of, and all because I was usually the child w the darkest skin in my classes. Thankfully, I was blessed w parents and extended family who always encouraged me, loved me, and accepted me w everything that I had. I have always been beautiful to them because I was a part of them. But w them loving and validating me (as parents and family SHOULD do), it’s NOTHING like realizing your worth on your very own. The very first time I heard someone say to me ‘you know, you are pretty for a dark skin girl’, I was angered. I vividly remember saying, in one of those instances, ‘you wanna run that by me again?’–they looked at me as if to say ‘did I say something wrong?’, and I proceeded to explain that I’m not pretty FOR a dark skin girl, but that I am a “pretty girl”. They reluctantly received what I was saying…good…just as long as they “got it”… (sidebar: me being a “pretty girl” has nothing to do w my Sorority lol).

I am a beautiful, dark-skinned woman…not beautiful FOR a dark-skinned woman; there is a difference in the two statements; a very BIG difference. I take great care of my skin (I’m actually pretty anal about it lbs), and it’s blemish free and soft to the touch (thanks to Drop’s skin care secrets). I keep myself together because that’s something that I love to do for me; others just take notice. I have a desire to encourage as many people as I can, and I try to look for ways to constantly improve “me”. Outside of that, I believe that I am beautiful; so that in and of itself MAKES me beautiful.

It’s always a good thing to watch what you say and how you say something. Don’t worry though; if you say this to me, I’ll get you straight!

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(Have you liked this page? Go now!)
Elle

Enough For Everyone! (27)

One thing I’ve noticed in my adult years, is that kids aren’t the only ones who don’t particularly like to “share”. Big ole grown men and women have a difficult time either sharing the spotlight, acknowledging a milestone in the life of another, or are just down right all about self.

I know I’m not the only one who has experienced some form of “hatred” or pettiness directed at them. In every single situation, everyone has that “thing” which sets them apart from the next person. And that’s ABSOLUTELY the way it should be. For example, I am a singer. God gave me that very sweet gift, and I use it #wisely. However, God also gave Faith Evans, Brandy, Dorinda Clark-Cole, and August NightinGale those very same sweet gifts. My sound is not like theirs; and because I appreciate my own gift over anything, I can celebrate the impact that THEIR gifts have had, and continue to have, on my musical ear. To attempt to chip away at them as artists, downplay their success, or to completely try to copy their styles, means that my focus has shifted away from my own gift. There’s nothing wrong w my gift…and I can celebrate them as well as celebrate my own. Those women mentioned above can straight up and down SING. Period. They have a gift that they work on continuously…and so do I! If there’s enough room for all of those vocal beasts to walk around and ALL be amazing, there’s also room for me to be just as awesome in my own way!

As a community of “people”–not focusing on any specific race (because every race “hates” on another)–we need to do better in learning what our own personal value is FIRST. I said this yesterday in response to a post that I was reading…”so much would NOT take place when a person is secure in themselves; and so much WILL take place when a person is NOT secure in themselves”. Just think: if you are confident in your own abilities, another person’s gifts/talents won’t sideswipe or impact yours at all. Your belief in self HAS to be first priority. No one will be able to do anything in the fashion that YOU do things; focus on that! You are a brand…yes #you…and there is enough room for you to “make it”! The next person is also a brand. If you are lucky enough to experience your neighbor’s blessing/breakthrough, praise God for it; because that means He’s in your neighborhood (My Daddy says this OFTEN…and it’s so true; I’m living this now)! I have met some people in such a short period of time, who have received tremendous blessings in their personal and professional endeavors, and I’m thankful to be able to SEE it!

I MUST thank all of my #true supporters in my business ventures, and the ones close enough to see what I’ve been blessed w in my personal life; I love you and I thank God for all of you. God made enough room for EVERYBODY to get it! Celebrate and be grateful for the space provided to you, and you’ll be able to easily celebrate someone else’s!

Elle

Just One Moment (22)

ONE single moment can change your entire outlook on any given day…

July30th may not mean much to anyone–just a random Monday–however that was the day that I fought for my life. The Doctors came out of the operating room, into the waiting area, and told my Daddy “we’re losing her”; I’m NOT supposed to be here, but by God’s grace, I AM here. I will never look at July30th the same EVER again. That “moment” on the morning of July30th changed my life forever.

If a woman’s beau proposes to her on a Tuesday, whatever she experienced earlier that day will no longer matter; that four word question has changed her life, as well as his, and her Tuesdays from now until eternity will all be different.

You get into your car, headed to meet up w friends for a celebration, but you’re thrown off course because of a car accident, due to a driver running a red light. Your survival of/regrouping from that accident will change how you drive…even if you were not the cause of the loss.

We associate our life’s experiences w “moments”. The day you deliver your child will be associated w what you were doing the “moment” prior to labor lol. The day you got “that job” will be associated w what you were doing the “moment” you received the job notification! The smile that you may give a stranger in passing may be the very “moment” that they then made the decision to push through a difficult time, instead of jumping off of a cliff to their death. When “he” or “she” wholeheartedly expresses their love for you, (and you realize what it took for them to open up to you), will be associated w where the two of you were headed, what was on tv, whatever the “moment” may have been.

Moments matter, period. Life is simply a vast array of moments, waiting to be remembered. Creating beautiful moments won’t be just for you though, dearest readers. The smile you randomly give/gave may never reveal what that gesture may have done for someone else’s life, so just do it anyway–that’s creating a beautiful moment. It may be something that you’ve done out of habit; who says that habits can’t be good?

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