Great Thursday!

It’s been a MINUTE since I’ve written on my own blog! Yes…I know…life can sometimes get insanely crazy, but I will no longer neglect my responsibility here!

Thank you for being so patient…and thank you for your support! Got plenty of updates for you:

  1. I am now a Brand Ambassador for Voice Of Hair! Follow them via Instagram as well! I am not a Contributing Writer for their blog, and I also submit pictures via their site to show case the newest and latest hair styles.
  2. I also have a published piece via Jet Magazine! I was able to submit a post regarding a few simple business tips.
  3. I am an official third quarter blogger for The Boss Network! This is a network that has been sited by Forbes and Inc Magazines as one of the top ten networking sites for women in business!
  4. I am back into runway modeling, and loving it!
  5. I am also back in the studio singing and recording, with a show this month with my Uncle Kirk Whalum!

To say that I have been busy, is an understatement, however it is NOT a complaint! My gifts are making room for me to move and grow, and I appreciate being handed the opportunity to serve in such ways. I will be posting more on my opinions about some of the things that are happening in the world as well. So much has happened since I last SERIOUSLY blogged, and my views on so many things are different…would LOVE to share and get your feedback.

Have an amazing Thursday! Feels so good to be back!

Follow me via IG at @lauranslane.

Ten Things That Love Should NOT Feel Like…

Being in love has got to be one of the most amazing feelings ever…next to seeing your newborn son or daughter for the first time after labor (so I hear). That “in love” feeling is also amazing when you are loved back.

Well…now knowing what love is, I also know what love is not. I’m not an authority on the subject, but the heart will never lie to you.

Let’s go:

  1. Love should never make you feel fear.
  2. Love should not feel like a “chore”.
  3. Love should not be extremely hard or feel tough.
  4. Love should never make you feel as though you are alone.
  5. If someone loves you, you should never feel as though they just “don’t care”.
  6. Love should never place you in a state of confusion.
  7. Love never fails; if it’s hurting you, then it isn’t love.
  8. Love should never feel as though it isn’t supportive; love IS an anchor and something that grounds you, holding you steady in the midst of ANYTHING.
  9. Love should never make you question your decision TO love (deep)…AND FINALLY…
  10. LOVE NEVER LIES…

I won’t part my lips to say I Love You and not mean it…that’s the problem though; people say it, knowing full well that it’s empty and FAR from sincere.

Your best bet? Pray before you commit yourself to someone. Let God order your steps in a new or even a more seasoned relationship! You can even get better footing w someone if you have fallen off track, yet you all are on the same page, and willing to work at the relationship. Do the work BEFORE things go sour (if they ever do). Just make sure that you know that “flowers, bells, whistles, and candy” ALL of the time is not real. There will be disagreements, heated discussions, anger, etc., but love has the extreme and undeniable power to conquer any of those things. Just have enough sense to keep an open mind.

Take my poll and let me know if you agree w this post!

Title: Sherry Burton Ways Virtual Book Tour Day 1!!!

I am happy to share with you a special article by Sherry.

Your Favorite Color Is For Your Healing Color.

The colors and images in your decor reflect aspects of yourself that can build you up or tear you down. Color can nurture your soul as food nourishes your body. Determine what colors are your favorites. Which ones feed you right down to your bones, and energize and heal you? Whatever colors they are, make sure that you have them somewhere in your environment. Choose items in your favorite colors, such as fabrics, vases, dishes, and flowers, and place them where they can feed you at a glance. Whether it is the violet light within an amethyst crystal or the vibrant turquoise glaze on your favorite mug, feast on the colors that nourish you.

The best way to learn about the effect of colors is to look at those we choose in our home environment. These give many clues to our personalities and inner feelings. Carefully chosen colors can build our self-image so that we are better able to cope with the stresses of modern life and improve our relationships with others.

Color preferences coincide with major changes in our lives, and a change in attitude or physical state is often accompanies by a change in our color preferences. Think about one of your favorite rooms in your house. What colors are mostly in that room? Do these colors uplift you or make you depressed? If so, find colors that make you feel good.

Tomorrow Faith Hunter will host the tour on her blog Faith Hunter with a video: “Mid Winter Blues? Here are Two Quick Interior Tips!” http://embracedc.com/about/blog

Visit Sherry’s website to sign up to win a prize!

* Grand prize: A copy of Sherry’s book along with her grand prize of a 30-minute H.O.M.E. Interior Environment Intro Coaching Session via Skype or in person depending on location.

* A copy of Sherry’s book along with a 20-minute Color Therapy Consultation via Skype. Color Therapy Consults for interior color is one of the first elements you notice when you walk into a room, and color resonates with you when you leave. Color sets a mood: The right color combination can transform a home or office and bring all who reside there new levels of energy. Custom color palettes for interior walls can bring happiness, harmony and well-being.
* A copy of Feel Good Spaces: A Guide for Decorating Your Home for the Body, Mind, & Spirit

To see the complete virtual book tour line up, follow each host on Twitter! And to connect with them on Facebook, click here!

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7BLOGGERDAYS: JAN11 Favorite Moment

One of my most favorite moments is when I decided to start my own business!

I was hesitant to do so in such a trying economic time…but one day, while on a brief medical leave from my job, I formulated my plan! I also recall being selected for jury duty, and thinking to myself “there is a chance that I will NOT get called; let me take my notebook and write out some ideas”…and that’s exactly what I did! I did not get called that day for duty, so I spent a FULL 6 or so hours writing out my vision for my company.

Well, I’m coming up on a ONE YEAR of being an entrepreneur, and it feels great! I woke up this morning to an email from someone soliciting me for their brands, plus emails from clients updating me on things that they need…that instantly made me smile. I LOVE what I do, and I am grateful that I did not let the financial hardships of the world cut into my dreams! Once I got over my initially hesitancy, I discovered that everything needed to “Just Do It” was on the inside!!

I am a better woman for staying focused on my goals! I challenge you to do the same!

 

12.12.12 My WebSite Launch! (32)

I am elated today because we are now at the official launch of my company website! (click the photo to be directed to the site!)

MY LOGO

I am thankful for my own diligence w my company, even in a time where people suggested that I “wait”. For what? Starting a business takes money in the beginning, but fulfilling a dream is priceless…and this is a dream! My late Mother would be so very proud of me!

I want to thank everyone who genuinely believes in me, those who have entrusted their business/brand w my company, the love of my life for his support, Freddie Taylor of Nimble Websites for their hard work and dedication, and a special thank you to myself…for staying the course, making room for my gifts, remaining FOCUSED, and making a route for me to leave the job that is holding me back.  I am GRATEFUL today for the things that God is adding to me!  If you learn ANYTHING from me, please learn this:

It’s ok to have a dream and to work towards making that dream your reality! Write YOUR vision and make it plain; your first belief MUST be in yourself and your own abilities.  Once this is your focus, there will be nothing…AND I DO MEAN NOTHING…that will be able to stop that train!!!

PHOTO FOR BIZ CARD1

Elle

Enough For Everyone! (27)

One thing I’ve noticed in my adult years, is that kids aren’t the only ones who don’t particularly like to “share”. Big ole grown men and women have a difficult time either sharing the spotlight, acknowledging a milestone in the life of another, or are just down right all about self.

I know I’m not the only one who has experienced some form of “hatred” or pettiness directed at them. In every single situation, everyone has that “thing” which sets them apart from the next person. And that’s ABSOLUTELY the way it should be. For example, I am a singer. God gave me that very sweet gift, and I use it #wisely. However, God also gave Faith Evans, Brandy, Dorinda Clark-Cole, and August NightinGale those very same sweet gifts. My sound is not like theirs; and because I appreciate my own gift over anything, I can celebrate the impact that THEIR gifts have had, and continue to have, on my musical ear. To attempt to chip away at them as artists, downplay their success, or to completely try to copy their styles, means that my focus has shifted away from my own gift. There’s nothing wrong w my gift…and I can celebrate them as well as celebrate my own. Those women mentioned above can straight up and down SING. Period. They have a gift that they work on continuously…and so do I! If there’s enough room for all of those vocal beasts to walk around and ALL be amazing, there’s also room for me to be just as awesome in my own way!

As a community of “people”–not focusing on any specific race (because every race “hates” on another)–we need to do better in learning what our own personal value is FIRST. I said this yesterday in response to a post that I was reading…”so much would NOT take place when a person is secure in themselves; and so much WILL take place when a person is NOT secure in themselves”. Just think: if you are confident in your own abilities, another person’s gifts/talents won’t sideswipe or impact yours at all. Your belief in self HAS to be first priority. No one will be able to do anything in the fashion that YOU do things; focus on that! You are a brand…yes #you…and there is enough room for you to “make it”! The next person is also a brand. If you are lucky enough to experience your neighbor’s blessing/breakthrough, praise God for it; because that means He’s in your neighborhood (My Daddy says this OFTEN…and it’s so true; I’m living this now)! I have met some people in such a short period of time, who have received tremendous blessings in their personal and professional endeavors, and I’m thankful to be able to SEE it!

I MUST thank all of my #true supporters in my business ventures, and the ones close enough to see what I’ve been blessed w in my personal life; I love you and I thank God for all of you. God made enough room for EVERYBODY to get it! Celebrate and be grateful for the space provided to you, and you’ll be able to easily celebrate someone else’s!

Elle

The Happy Side (26)

It’s so very unfortunate that people will find any excuse NOT to be happy. I find it hard to believe that, for some, there is NOTHING good found in a day…at any point. I happened to be tweeting about how some would rather focus on jerks who cause them drama; my good friend Cynara replied back “it gives them something to do”. I couldn’t agree w her more…

But something to do? Being miserable, negative, and otherwise petty is some people’s “something to do”? Do you know how much time you have to dedicate to being “messy”? You first really have to #have frequent drama, which (to me) means that in most cases, you’re actually doing something to cause it if you ALWAYS have it. Secondly, you truly have to SEEK to focus on the negative aspects of a situation or of a day, which means you “major in minors”, as my Daddy says (love him!!!!). Thirdly, but not lastly (I’m just stopping at three) you haven’t learned the art of ignoring ignorance. Everything doesn’t require a response or reaction. I’m just saying…

Now…we all have rough times w life, people, jobs, etc.; I just don’t personally want to be subjected to you–the one who doesn’t yet have a handle on how to keep it moving–on a daily basis. Some ppl get muted; some get deleted; some just get all the way blocked.

I will be the FIRST to admit that I have my struggles, my tears fall, and my mood will shift. I just don’t want to be known as a “complainer”…so a lot of things are kept “in house”, if you will. Aaaaaaaaand, the vast majority of my personal life is simply none of anyone’s business.

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The face shown here, is highly indicative of my daily mood…even tempered. I’m more or less just glad to see another day!

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I smile!

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I’m shy!

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I’m silly lol

Buuuuuut I’m genuinely “happy”. I have chosen a happier side of life, even in the midst of a ridiculous moment! I keep pushing until my hardest moments are only a fraction of who I am. Eeeeeeeven in the loss of my Mother, I #chose to be thankful that her pain was gone. I simply choose joy.

Elle

Your Past: And You're Holding On Foooooor…(25)

(And I’m serious when I say this)…I am going to SERIOUSLY send up prayers for KeKe Wyatt.

Disclaimer: I am not blogging to belittle her, bash her or to talk badly about her…but she needs prayer and peace.

KeKe Wyatt, for those unfamiliar, is one of five “Divas” on the new series R&B Divas, that is aired on Monday evenings on the tvOne network. I am personally a fan of KeKe’s voice; she can straight just SANG. HOWEVER…she is harboring ill feelings that she has not yet resolved from a previous marriage. On one episode, KeKe is in the “booth”, getting ready to sing. Her husband is in the room w the music engineers, and a young lady comes in and gives him a note. Not sure what the note was about, but in a “secure” eye, the way in which the note was passed to him was not offensive. KeKe noticed this interaction, and immediately snapped at the young lady AND her husband (1st mistake). She went on to call the gesture inappropriate, she ended up crying, and EVERYONE IN THE STUDIO was brought into the situation (2nd mistake). She chose to express her anger out in public, and her manager (I believe) had to pull her into another room to have a sidebar conversation to calm her down, etc.

ADDRESSING THE FIRST MISTAKE: There truly was no reason for her to have snapped on either party. Period. I could see if the young lady came in the room and tongued her husband down…she only brought in a note, which could have been a phone message, a confirmation on a gift that he was getting for KeKe, or something pertaining to their 5.5 kids (KeKe was pregnant at the time of this incident; she has since birthed her 6th child named Wyatt). We haven’t a clear clue as to what was going on, nor do we know what that note was about, so why snap? If you’d like to know what the note was about, ask him!

ADDRESSING THE SECOND MISTAKE: Relationships are complicated on their own, minus outside influences…why was everyone in the studio invited into the resolution of, or discussion surrounding, what had just happened? At THIS point, time is MONEY…studio sessions are not cheap, so now the session time is spent trying to calm her down and to counsel her briefly. Wrong place, wrong time…

ALTHOUGH KEKE’S SITUATION MAY BE EXTREME, KEKE IS NOT UNLIKE MANY OF YOU READING THIS BLOG…either that, or you are familiar w someone who may struggle w insecurities from their past…

I completely and wholeheartedly believe in love. 100%; not wavering from this; I’m all for being in love. But IN THAT, there’s no room for your baggage. True, we will all carry something w us, but if you are still harboring #painful feelings from a previous heartache, you may need to spend some time alone and regroup; and no…hopping into a NEW relationship/dating situation will not help you to “get over” your pain, so please Sir/please Ma’am spare someone else from your uncertainty; have a few seats! Speaking w your Pastor, a Counselor, or just taking time to rediscover those things that you lost are all helpful when recovering from a past hurt. I remember being hurt very badly in a past relationship, and I waited seven years before I got into another one. I vivdly recall losing 10 lbs due to not eating, I was pretty much existing (not living), and I remember how ANGRY my Father was at the guy who had caused me to be in such pain. After about six months of going thru the emotions I had surrounding that hurtful relationship, I was ready to “have conversations” w men. After a full year and some change had passed, I began dating…but my point in even mentioning that is…I took time to make sure that I was not about to inadvertently place the responsibility of fixing my broken heart on someone else (also, my time frame of healing is not necessarily going to work for the next person…that’s something that you have to figure out on your own). What people ALSO don’t realize is…when you make someone “pay for” what a past beaux did, you start a cycle of pain and potentially reckless behavior. What do hurting people do? They hurt other people. So see NOOOOOOW you’ve hurt the new guy/girl, and they may go on a spree of sexcapades, playing the field, and breaking hearts along the way. ONE ACTION can cause a CHAIN of reactions…is it worth it to mess up someone else’s life SIMPLY because yours isn’t together? Get Your Life, Sir/Ma’am…

I know I know…people don’t like to be alone. So? I don’t like bills LOL. But seriously…until a more mature and nurturing relationship comes along? You may NEED to be alone! There’s no way you can “get away” from yourself, so spend some time getting to know what you will and will not tolerate. You have to rebuild after someone has attempted to tear you down. That stuff can HURT; don’t reopen the wound; let it heal. Be good to yourself FIRST before you expect for someone else to be good to you. Men and women can equally “smell” an insecure individual…and…some take advantage OF someone vulnerable/insecure. Become “whole” again so that no more wool will be pulled over your eyes. Once that rain called pain has gone away, the healing comes in looking for the rainbow.

eLLe

Keep Moving!! (21)

Don’t you absolutely HATE when someone takes something that you’ve expressed in the WORST context possible? And often times, it’s because they may be stressed out or tired?

Not your problem right? Right!

Someone took me making a correction to them, regarding something very personal to me, COMPLETELY in the wrong spirit, and as a result, I received a very snippy message. Now…20+ yr old Elle may have snipped back lol, but I didn’t. The thing that they were incorrect on is STILL important to me, and…in spite of their feelings, the correction had to be made clear. Period. No apologies, no take backs. I responded to the party accordingly, and separately from the group. This individual is a total asset to a specific project, and I don’t take their work/dedication/affiliation lightly. HOW-IN-SO-EVER…lol the thing personal to me still matters. So at the end of the day, I still appreciate that person, but they need to make note of the correction.

Thinking before “snipping” could save a relationship (professional or personal) from being “clipped”. Also, making sure to always “be you” and to be true to what matters in your life teaches another person respect FOR your life, whether they “like” you or not. As for the incident I experienced, we’ll just hope the other party is getting enough rest at night! Stress mixed w being tired is no good for the body and the mind!!

Think before you “snip”!

Choose Responses Wisely! (17)

You have to truly recognize when someone has decided that YOU are their target. And it doesn’t have to be a specific reason i.e. you forgot to call them at 8pm but called them at 8:02pm (petty right?), you missed their birthday celebration, etc., or you’ve decided to focus more on your own life…I meeeeeeeean the above reasons ARE reasons that people will put you in their line of fire…and w subtweets/sub-FB statuses/subpar communication…but it’s strictly up to you how you will respond…or whether you will even respond.

People have made a career out of being sh*t starters; that’s just what they do. They are often times annoying, attention-seekers, insecure, or some are purely just in it for a healthy debate (not all sh*t starters are whack lol). But now…you KNOW FULL WELL the difference. Just be advised that when you are doing great, stuff will always be thrown at you. If you are in a state of misery, or things aren’t on the up and up right now, some people secretly LOVE a person to struggle. Let me help you out (and this has worked for me):

1. Let them do what and how they do– you can’t change a person, but you do have options! Everything is about “choices”. If you don’t wish to communicate with them, well then don’t! If it’s on a professional level, and you’re dealing w a jerk, just remain professional in all exchanges; once they are aware that you just aren’t falling into their trap, they will move on to another.

2. Do not respond to their ignorance– this is self-explanatory; you don’t even have to acknowledge them. HIGH key, that pisses them off. That’s not necessarily your aim (or maybe it is lol), but remember…from a distance, a person can’t tell who the fool is if two people are arguing. Don’t give in to their whack agendas; it’s NEVER worth it. People able to pull you all the way out of your body like that have OFFICIALLY placed you in their pockets. Just ignore them.

3. Think about the source– if you know this person regularly has something to say, keep that in mind also before you make the decision to react.

4. Laugh– it burns calories anyway

People are on assignment to cause discord, and unfortunately, some of these assignments are self-imposed. There are a few who actually get paid to be jerks lol (I won’t name names, but you KNOW who they are, think about media outlets). But to the ones who are out here blindly on a mission to disrupt peace? Don’t be their next client.

*smoochface*

Elle